it's a blessing to be able to express and describe and capture life and its beauty. a pity not many people fully comprehend the power of that ability. this is more evident in the place i live where people focus on many things that really mean nothing in the end. i find myself more frequently thinking "what's the point". but if it comes to that, then there's really no answer for me.
i am envious of those whose gift flows freely. for me it takes much effort and more often than not, it ends up in frustration and nothing comes out of it. i try and i try and i try. i embarrass myself. i care too much. a song, a picture, a poem, a simple tune.
this leads on to many thoughts that make me sad. am i like everyone else who are trying not to be everyone else. sigh. i tend to shut down here.
you have no idea what i'm saying haven't you. i make my point.
